Saturday, May 3, 2008

Snakes on a Band... Practice

First thing's first. Practiced with the band yesterday, and came up with a new tune! Here's a clip:

Also, I managed to catch Snakes on a Plane and have time to watch the thing in almost its entirety - I missed the first 17 mins (boo hoo). My impressions and observations:

Note: Edited due to wanting to expand my audience (lol)

- A girl got bit on her nipple, much like a baby would attack a teat. Hilarious.
- An old lady got her eye bit off. Hilarious.
- This one woman went to barf into a bag and a snake jumped out and bit her tongue. Ultra-hilarious and unexpected!
- A man went to pee, got bit on the junk from a snake hiding under the rim of the toilet. He proceeded to bash his head on the mirror above the sink and wipe his bloody head on the wall as he died. Hella funny.
- This one cold-hearted businessman decided that to save everyone from a python (fell out of a light fixture), he'd throw this girl's annoying toy dog to it for lunch. After berating the old fogey, he said something like "It's just a dog! It would do the same thing to us!" Moments later, he was the python's dessert.

People who didn't die from snakes:
- This dude got trampled and a woman's high heel got lodged into his ear! Nasty and painful!
- People started getting impaled after falling off the stairs (stairs on a plane!?) when the banister broke off. This one guy got paled in the jugular! Raw! (lol)

Samuel L. Jackson said:
- "Well, that's good news - snakes on crack." After hearing about the snakes possibly aggro after being exposed to pheromones that women may be wearing.
- "Turn left! Turn this big mother****er left, Troy!" Yelling at Troy (played by Kenan of Kenan and Kel fame) when he had trouble stopping the plane after landing.
- "All praises to the Playstation!" After landing, thanks to Troy's flight sim game skills.
- Of course, there's the ever-famous: "Enough is enough! I've had it with these mother****in' snakes on this mother****in' plane!" That was said approximately 1 hour and 27 minutes into the movie.

One thing I didn't know about snakes: they can climb stairs! I'm not talking about any old stairs, but those that are disjointed, like spiral stairs. Let's just forget for a moment that these were CG snakes.

Finally, no black people (i.e. African-Americans who had lines in the movie) died! Is this a first for the horror genre?


Matt said...

That jam is good. I'm digging the harmonies.

MrCHUPON said...

Maybe Barack should watch this movie -- and specifically the plane-landing part -- before he complains that videogames are raising our children. ...or maybe that'll hurt more than it helps... >_>